Are Chinese names backwards?

Here's what you should know about Chinese names...especially if you have a Chinese girlfriend.

Chinese names are backwards!

Chinese people have either two or three words in their name. The first word is actually their surname. The remaining word or words are their given name.

For example, my Chinese girlfriend's name is “Zhou Hong”. Her surname is “Zhou” and her given name is “Hong”. Here's another example: Her Dad's name is “Zhou Chang Ming”. So, his surname is “Zhou” and his given name is “Chang Ming”.

So what do you do? Call her by her surname?

An author from the US was hired to consult for a Chinese company.

This fellow finally clued in after months of calling his boss “Chen”.

“You mean to tell me your last name is Chen? All this time I've been calling you by your LAST name? Why didn't anybody tell me?!”

Be careful when you ask someone in China what their “first” or “last” name is. It could be very confusing for you both of you. It's better to say “surname” or “given name”, just to be 100% clear.

In the southern part of China, people generally replace the surname (or the first two words if her name is three words long) with the sound “Ah”.

So she might be called “Ah-Hong” or “Ah-Lin”.

All my Chinese girlfriend's friends call her “Ah-Hong”. And so that's what I called her too.

Then I received this tip that paved the way for more open and closer communication with my Chinese girlfriend.

And I'm going to hand you that pearl of wisdom, right here and now.

My private Chinese tutor flipped when I told her that I call my Chinese girlfriend “Ah-Hong”. Apparently in the north, where my tutor is from (Beijing), people never use that. And if they do, it's not considered very affectionate.

“You don't want to call your girlfriend the same nickname like everyone else does. You want to address her in a way that shows you have a more affectionate, intimate connection,” she said.

My private tutor then gave me these wise words of advice - call her “Xiao” (Shee-yow) Hong. “Shee-yow” (rhymes with “Meow”) means small or young.

Put your own Chinese girlfriend's given name after the word “Xiao”. That's all there is to it.

It's a more affectionate way to address her - and it's probably the nickname she was called as a schoolgirl.

Calling her by her nickname brings back happy memories from her childhood.

And it makes her feel young and cute and pretty again!

Do you want your own Chinese name? Many Chinese people have adopted common English names to make it easier for us to remember their name, relate to them and to make friends. Be sure to read this before you get your own Chinese name.