Chinese Valentine's Day - What is Qixi?

Qixi is a Chinese festival that everyone who dates a Chinese person should be aware of. Keep reading to find out when, why and how to celebrate this special Chinese evening.

One of the best things about dating a Chinese person is that you get to celebrate Valentine's Day twice every year. That's right — once on February 14 and the second time on Qixi!

What is Qi xi and why is it important? Qixi is the Chinese version of Valentine's Day. It's celebrated on the seventh night of the seventh month of the Chinese lunar calendar. Usually that happens sometime in August on our calendar.

And that's why it's also called the Double Seven festival.

In 2006, Qixi was celebrated twice in one summer! Plus the regular Valentine's Day on the 14th of February made three celebrations that year.

How is that possible? Because of the Chinese lunar calendar and “leap months”. Instead of a leap day, the entire seventh month was repeated that year!

I was in China at the time. And this was before I really knew what Qixi was all about. I remember asking my Chinese girlfriend what the excitement was all about that night. She told me it was a lover's festival — like Valentine's Day.

“Again? Didn't we just have this last month?!” I thought, “the Chinese sure do take their romance seriously!”

Qi xi actually means seven-evening in Chinese. The Chinese characters are: 七夕 It's pronounced chee (as in cheese) she. And the tones go like this: Qīxì

七夕快乐 is one way to say Happy Qixi in Chinese. It's pronounced chee (as in cheese) she kwaii (waii as in Hawaii) - lah! The pinyin with tones is: Qīxì kuàilè.

Most couples in China also celebrate Valentine's Day on February 14th. But be careful — sometimes Chinese New Year (celebrated for over two weeks) overshadows our traditional Valentine's Day. If your Chinese significant other has family obligations on February 14th, a little patience and understanding can go a long way.

Remember Chinese Valentine's Day is coming in the summer!

How is Chinese Valentine's Day celebrated in modern China?

Recently I celebrated another Qixi in China.

It was so crowded! But you know what? Most people didn't seem to mind. It was lover's night. They were so enthralled with their lover — nothing could phase them. Not even getting smooshed into each other from the crowds.

And the restaurants were even more packed! Not those typical, loud, Chinese restaurants where large groups like to discuss business over a banquet table. Those places were business as usual.

But the Thai, Japanese, American and other foreign restaurants with plenty of tables for two? Those places had lineups of couples out the door and around the block eagerly aniticipating their romantic dinners.

Every waiting woman cradled a huge bouquet of flowers. Just like Valentine's Day in the West, shopkeepers love to promote this holiday. More and more, it is very similar to a Valentine's evening out in a major American city.

Bouquet of blue roses S. Ackerman

One beautiful Chinese lady held a generous bouquet of more than two dozen blue roses. In China, blue roses represent a hopeful love. For instance, the hope a common man feels when he falls in love with a Princess (as told in this Chinese folktale about a blue rose).

Here's something that was new for me — inside the restaurant, couples received a folded paper boat with a candle. Each couple lit their candle and launched their boat in a nearby fountain.

If that idea really floats your boat, here's how to make your own...

Another Qixi tradition: You write your deepest wish onto a paper, then hang it in a tree. Some restaurants and most temples have special trees overflowing with notes.

Group of people launching Chinese paper lanterns. Ben Dalton

And another romantic idea: In some more remote areas (away from the big Chinese cities), couples can launch flying paper lanterns in the air. They look like mysterious floating lights in the night sky...and they deliver your special wish up to the heavens.

When is Qixi?

It changes every year, because of the Chinese lunar calendar. Here's a table indicating some of the days when Qixi is celebrated. You can also subscribe to our newsletter and we'll remind you of upcoming Qixi festivals as they occur.

Upcoming dates to celebrate Chinese Valentine's Day

2011	Saturday, August 6th
2012	Thursday, August 23rd
2013	Tuesday, August 13th
2014	Saturday, August 2nd
2015	Thursday, August 20th
2016	Tuesday, August 9th
2017	Monday, August 28th
2018	Friday, August 17th
2019	Wednesday, August 7th
2020	Tuesday, August 25th
2021	Saturday, August 14th
2022	Thursday, August 4th
2023	Tuesday, August 22th
2024	Saturday, August 10th
2025	Friday, August 29th

Legends of Qixi: The Ultimate Long Distance Relationship:

As with any legend, there are multiple version of the Qixi story floating around that have been passed down through generations. Let's look at what they all have in common.

Qixi is about lovers. The essence of the tale is two lovers separated. Some stories feature a celestial goddess falling in love with a mortal man. Talk about the ultimate long distance interracial relationship!

As the story goes, the mortal man finds a magical way to become immortal, and joins his lover up in the starry night sky.

The parents of the goddess come between the two lovers and separate them. In some versions of the story, the goddess' mother (perhaps the dreaded Chinese mother-in-law? ) uses her celestial hairpin to tear open the heavens, separating the two lovers. That's how the Milky Way was formed.

On one night of each year, the two lovers re-unite. That night is Qixi — the seventh day of the seventh month.

Here's a full recounting of the Qixi legend. In this version, it's the father-in-law who comes between the two lovers.

The Herdsman and the Weaver-girl

The fable of Aquila and Vega is known in Chinese mythology as the Herdsman and the Weaver-girl. The daughter of the Sun-god was so constantly busy with her loom that her father became worried at her habits. He thought that by marrying her to a neighbor, who herded cattle on the banks of the Silver Stream of Heaven (the Milky Way), she might awake to a brighter manner of living.

No sooner did the maiden become wife than her habits and character changed for the worse. She became not only very merry and lively, but neglected her loom and needle. She gave up her nights and days to play and idleness. No silly lover could have been more foolish than she.

The Sun-king, in great wrath at all this, concluded that the husband was the cause of it. Determined to separate the couple, he ordered him to move to the other side of the river of stars. They could meet only once a year, on the seventh night of the seventh month.

To make a bridge over the flood of stars, the Sun-king called myriads of magpies, who flew together, and, making a bridge, supported the poor lover on their wings and backs as if on a roadway of solid land.

So, bidding his weeping wife farewell, the lover-husband sorrowfully crossed the River of Heaven, and all the magpies instantly flew away. But the two were separated, the one to lead his ox, the other to ply her shuttle during the long hours of the day with diligent toil, and the Sun-king again rejoiced in his daughter's industry.

At last the time for their reunion drew near, and only one fear possessed the loving wife. What if it should rain? For the River of Heaven is always full to the brim, and one extra drop causes a flood which sweeps away even the bird-bridge. But not a drop fell; all the heavens were clear.

The magpies flew joyfully in myriads, making a way for the tiny feet of the little lady. Trembling with joy, and with heart fluttering more than the bridge of wings, she crossed the River of Heaven and was in the arms of her husband.

This she did every year. The husband stayed on his side of the river, and the wife came to him on the magpie bridge, except on the sad occasions when it rained. So every year we hope for clear weather, and this happy festival is celebrated alike by old and young.

These two constellations are worshiped principally by women, that they may gain cunning in the arts of needlework and making of fancy flowers. Watermelons, fruits, vegetables, cakes, and other foods are placed with incense in the reception-room of each home.

- adapted from E. T. C. Werner's, "Myths and Legends of China"

How do you celebrate Qixi? Have you ever been in China during Qixi? What unique traditions did you notice?

What was the best, most fun and most romantic way you celebrated Qixi? Share your story here...